Tips to help you develop excellent oral communication skills

1. Relax: If you think too much about an encounter, you'll likely freeze in the middle of the conversation and appear nervous. Going on a job interview and social gatherings evoke anxiety in many people. One way to overcome this problem is to stop worrying about how others may perceive you. It takes two people to have a meaningful conversation. Offer a smile, and confidently ask simple questions such as, "how are you," "are you having fun."

2. Use Humor: If you have a funny side to your personality, break the ice with a joke. Be tasteful. Everyone may not appreciate your sick sense of humor or crude jokes. You don't have to be the party clown, nor does your joke have to create a bellow of laughter.

3. Don't Monopolize the Conversation: When nervous, some people have the tendency to "shoot off at the mouth." In other words, they ramble uncontrollably. If trying to make a good first impression, don't talk too much. If the person asks you a simple question such as, "where are you from," offer a short 30 second answer. This is not an invitation to disclose you entire past, and talk for ten uninterrupted minutes. The person is probably not interested in where you attended elementary school, or the fact that you've lived in ten different cities.

4. Know When to End the Conversation: Person with poor communication skills dread the "awkward silence." If the conversation starts to die, you could casually change the topic and ask the person a question that's completely off subject; or you could simply say, it's been nice talking with you," and move on.

Bring your own conversation piece

If you're heading off to a party or get-together where you suspect that you won't know a lot of the other guests, it's a good idea to bring something with you that is highly likely to be a good conversation piece. If you're a hat person, choose one that has a great story that goes with it (or make one up on the way) and be prepared to tell people about it when they ask. Or wear an unusual accessory or piece of jewelry that will catch people's attention and compel them to ask you about it. If you're bringing a gift to a party, add an eye-catching flourish to the wrapping, which will stimulate some other creative soul to ask you about your original wrapping technique, or about the nature of the gift. Conversation pieces provide a non-threatening way to start a conversation.


Effectively, you're giving people an excuse to come and talk to you, by making yourself appear approachable and interesting because there's something about you that is an obvious talking point. You don't want to arrive looking bland and exactly like everyone else; you're trying to stimulate discussion, not a reaction of bored disinterest.